Monday, March 10

4-a-Side Round Up with Big Ron and Clive Tyldesley

"So then Ron, how did you see the game take shape?"

"Well, Clive, I used my eyes as usual. "

"Good stuff Ron, can you give us a rundown of the players?"

"Well Clive, lets start with Peter's team; Peter himself came out early doors and gave it the full gun. After twenty minutes though, he was dead on his feet. Might be carrying a knock, you know. Then there's Phil, by god, he's an amusement arcade this one isn't he Clive? Looked like he was gonna break out the old electric boogaloo at one stage, scored some good goals mind."

"Thanks Ron, what about the big lad up front?"

"Tony M? I'll tell you what, he's got the skills to pay the bills, this lad. He might be knocking on the years now, but he shows the lad inside, does a little lollipop and gives it the full gun into the top corner. The last of the team, Paul, well, I'll tell you what Clive, he was a bit Easy-Oasy to start with, but eventually he got into the crowd scene, gave the keeper the eyes and shovelled one into the bottom corner."

"That's right Ron; an amazing start from those lads but a superb comeback from Mikey's side. Reminiscent of that famous night in Barcelona, Ole Solskjaer and all that."

"Mikey started slowly, but like his shirt, he came to life after a while. Some cracking work late on to nearly inspire a comeback, he was in the wide awake club in the last third alright."

"Took a bit of a knock though didn't he Ron?"

"Well, I'll tell you what Clive, he's gone down like Buddy Holly there."

(off mic - "ha ha ha ha")

"As for Chrissy, he chucks his weight around, shows well and takes his man outside and from behind. A superb arrive at the far stick for one of his goals mind. KG, not bad in the middle of the park, but goes down in installments between the sticks. Took up some nice positions, but some of the passing left him empty."

"What about Dirty Richard, Ron?"

"Well, I'll tell you what Clive, he's been watching cartoons if he thinks he can score from some of the angles he gives it the full gun from. Put himself about and stuck in few reducers early doors as well."

"Thanks for that Ron. We'll be back next week for FA cup semi final action, featuring Marske United against Shotton Colliery Welfare. To finish Ron, what do you think of Marcel Desailly?"

"Well, I'll tell you what Clive, he's just a fucking lazy ni....."

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